Foundational Layers

Gregorian 2012 is here and for me has been heralding its presence since the end of Samhain - the roar is still going as we move toward the Chinese Chūn Jié - Spring Festival the end to the winter season and the Year of The Dragon . While neither a follower of Celtic or Chinese practices this Native America Kemetic priestess is enchanted to enjoy and resonate to the earthly cycles represented by each. Today its about cleaning and cleansing - cementing another layer on my spiritual foundation for this coming year.  I began this years journey with the earthly union to my spirit mate last year in May.  Truly he is the binder in who I am and who I will be.  For his God and my Goddess brought this union to earthly fruition and strengthen us to sing as the one soul we are.  He is the Sun of my Soul gifted from RA.

So much went out with the old  - Osiris started cleaning house last summer.  "Friends" came and went. So thankful Osiris removed a few who I found repulsive on a moral and ethical note.  By morals I mean all morals. Those who are perverted and deceitful I find disgust my soul, thus my deities swiftly dealt with them. Some connections I allowed only to wonder if I did the right thing. I forged new associations that have made my soul sing and have only become deeper. Some connections were extremely surface and have afforded me intense amusement. Sad to say some connections within the "community" were distressing to experience, a few I came across was nothing more than dealing with a facade and them protecting their viewpoint irregardless of others, hating being disagreed with and definitely lacking focus to further true knowledge.  Most truly I learned more from their going than from the time of interaction. Blessing from Osiris in their going.



This Year of The Dragon is not about passivity its about action, we are ending the Wood cycle transitioning to the Fire - fantastic unpredictability is the theme in 2012.  Its also not about what was removed in 2011, that's so last year.  This year is about strengthening those connections that push my boundaries in a positive manner, nurturing those people, events and environments that support me and my bid to be a better human.  I am not interested in balance.  Being in balance is an illusion, MAYBE I will allow it is that in SEEKING balance we begin to make ourselves better.  We live in a universe of duality/polarity.  Change is the only thing that remains the same.  For me to be in balance is to be static, in stasis, not growing.  It is the human condition to seek, to strive, to yearn - curiosity was never born from balance. Balance does not push our boundaries causing us to grow. To be in harmony does not mean the same, for different notes make the beauteous composition.  I do not desire to sing my song as others do.  Most truly my best creations come at a time when I am pushed, lack sleep and/or have other pressing commitments.  But to sing with others who have found their own voice - this is divine communion.

This year for me will be about reforging my relationship with my Deities to strengthen that foundational layer.  Isis has been in my life since I was 9, Osiris for over 3 decades and RA {The Great Spirit - God}has been with me always.  But to wish for a deeper connection, a wiser understanding, a communion of souls; this is my goal, to chase this actively, pushing myself.  This year will be magnificent, flamboyant, unpredictable and laborious.  But I excel under hard work - bring it on.  Knowing I have my deities and my spirit mate - do I need anything else? Not at all - strengthening the tie that binds to these beings is what my soul will live for in 2012.

RA  Isis and Osiris

THE DARK ROAD OF TRUTH

The darkened road of truth doth cry

The lighted road of illusion doth lie

The harder task for me I will choose

Knowing false friends I soon will lose

Moon and wind guide my shadowy day

For Osiris protects the sacred way

I travel through valley of iniquity and light

Bearing the truth of RA’s holy might

For many the truth will refuse to hear

The human heart is too filled with fear

For unrest stirs their troubled soul

Imagined happiness the hunted goal

The holy words of RA I take far afield

Heru is my sword, Isis my shield

Falter I may but want I shall never

For he is part of my soul forever

~Thy Daughter

Emergence

The moon changes season after season
In stasis I wait holding secret my reason
The stars are aligned; I now break the skin
Time to emerge. . .transformed again.

Weaving My New Universe - Creating Intentions

I can already feel the changes that 2012 will herald making themselves known now as the Winter Solstice surges closer. My time of quiet reflection, this time of no time, is coming to an end. I will always continue to honor and remember my ancestors.  As for my deities; I hope I show their glory and my love for them with every breath I take and every action public and private.  Reflection has brought me to the threshold of creation.  Like a super nova or stellar nursery new intentions swirl about me and are being formed.

As I continue to look into the mirror of me - I wonder if I have too much on my plate; I work daily at a full time job, I go to school full time, I write passionately almost desperately for the symbols aching to be made manifest into words surge inside me.  I also love weaving my gemstones, clay and metals into mystical creations.  I have received several new custom orders for jewelry, amulets and pendulums which I cannot wait to start upon.  AND now I am considering a new volunteer position.

I feel so many desires vying for a position – not first place but a position that gets addressed – work, school, writing, gemstones, social commitments, community commitments – spiritual, friends.  In no way am I feeling overwhelmed, just wishing I could get to all my desires, projects, ‘want-to’s’, obligations cleanly with enough time for each.

By bitter experience I know when I have all the time in the world (not working a day job) I will procrastinate my duties and obligations.  Sad to say I love to feel pushed to the limit or down to the wire.  I ‘feel’ I do my best work, and being a psych student I know this can be a faulty assessment to apply across the board; things fall through the cracks, are not done efficiently or need correcting.  But all in all I feel from my type A personality perspective that 9 out of 10 times I am quick, accurate and on target – self analyzing is not always spot on.

I also noticed that when I am not working my creativity dries up – my writing and my gemstone weaverie.   I firmly believe we need to see the outside world, interact with it daily in order to translate our view of said world, process the emotions these different environments evokes, digest our reactions or even to mythically weave what-if scenarios. I definitely believe we need a bar to set our interpretation against and a lined back-drop to color and fill it in with all the colors of the palette the deities have given us.

Of course all this rambling is taking me inevitably back to my intentions this coming year.  Schoolwork is always front and center and work.  Dovetailing the two is on my immediate horizon.  But my creative side is reaching for my writing – weaving new and old creations. I am currently working on two pieces I am hoping to submit soon.  I most definitely wish to fully explore my writing and expand my on volunteering.  These are the two items that my mind seems to turn back to time and again.  Not to mention my budding novel The Desert which still holds sway over my dreams, my subconscious, my waking life at work and home.

My intentions – shapeless shadows - swirling mists that have hovered on my horizon all year, are now congealing into a shape soon to manifest – brought in to very real being. - Weaving my new universe . . .

Confronting Life - Avoiding Mediocrity

Confronting new issues subjects, possibilities, alternate roads now.  When I say confronting I mean to challenge, to meet face to face, to brave, to dare, even to defy.  Sometimes we cannot just 'consider' new possibilities.  We need to feel and explore beyond 'weigh the pros and cons' attitude.  There are paths, ideas, events, subjects that must be confronted in defying manner.  To understand them, overcome them or engage wholeheartedly.

Especially in order to realize our potential, stretch our personal event horizon so that our very selves do not fall into the black hole of mediocrity.  I was joking with my beloved today, when he took me to lunch about mediocrity.  I was being extremely weird, saying outlandish things.  I kidded him about being a form of 'different' he has never seem.  He told me had seem it all.  Somehow as we were joking I feigned deep felt hurt and dramatically told him that he had trounced my desire to explore mediocrity as a mundane path for my soul. After we wiped away the tears from the deep belly laugh my wondrous mate in life told me I may be many things but never mediocre. Even if I tried to be mediocre I would make it my own, in true demon goddess fashion (explaining my mood swings when I desperately need to eat  and sleep).

Back to mediocrity, many times we are content to think about, mull over or consider new alternatives, unique situations or the unknown in an out of body, lets sit around drinking coffee and philosophize about this in the non-committal arena of 'what if-ing'.   I believe these new events, circumstance and situations should be met head on as if we are preparing for battle, or as if we have been dumped in a foreign country with no contacts.  Viewing these challenges as if our survival depends on it - and in a way it does.

Do we wish to just survive, hang on, scrape though - never rocking the boat afraid our neat little mediocre ordered life might be upset.  So we are turned over in the water - maybe we find the water is shallow or we float.  For me I love taking these challenges to find I can breather under water or I can fly.  So now I relish the challenge - I have taken up my torch and knapsack ready to engage these new possibilities in the aggressive manner that is me. Which means no whining today.